Excerpts From My Diary #7 - First Love Stays Forever

“How come are you so quiet today, Garima?” He asked with a slight smile on his face.

The words sunk in slowly. He actually took notice of me. A part of me just jumped out of joy. Still, I kept silent. I was actually a bit disturbed because of one of my past relationships. And I also wanted him to inquire a bit more.

“Try sharing, I might help. I have not been good in handling my life but I am great in advising on such issues.” He chuckled a bit.

I felt a bit comfortable now. He was chatting just like a friend. I liked this side of him. He somehow talked me into sharing stuff with him.

“Why is it so that our first love never really goes away? Why can’t we just get over it? I mean we get over many relationships, friendships, crushes, flings, etc. but that first love, dude, I hate it. It never really goes out of your heart.” I spoke all my frustration out. I was so irritated at being so helpless in front of my first love, everytime.

He smiled. I could see he had an answer for that. He stood up, went to the edge of the terrace and started speaking.

“You got to understand one thing, Garima. Our first love is the one that sticks with us because he or she is the only person who will ever receive all of you. You in your most natural form. After that, you learn better. But most of all, no matter what, a part of you shall remain behind forever in the heart of the one you loved – a part no future lover could ever get, no matter what. A part of him/her shall always live with you, too.

That part holds innocence – the belief that love really could last forever. It holds friendship and pain, trial and error, that one kiss you’ll never forget and that night under the stars that you can never get back. It holds youth and everything you thought love could be.

Everything that was proven wrong.” He finished with a sigh.

I was totally awestruck. He just spelled it so perfectly. I felt contented. I felt at peace.

I so knew I was in love with him.

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