Friday, 4 April 2014

Excerpts From My Diary #8 - Hatred Over Love, Anyday!

“Is that how you walk with a girl?” Garima asked him with a smile. She was just glad that he had agreed to walk around the park with her. And he was just looking at the blocks and walking with his head down.

Wearing a black overcoat over his black shirt, his two weeks old stubble, and that inexplicable emotion in his eyes, he looked so desirable. Atleast to me. and his I-don’t-give-a-fuck attitude he walked blankly. Nothing on his face. Nothing on his mind. He was hardly aware of the fact that I was there with him.

“I am sorry. I haven’t walked around with girls much. I don’t know what to do actually.” He replied in a polite manner.

“You just need to talk.”

“Hahh! Now that is a task, I believe. I’d prefer listening.” He replied with a short smile.

I loved this short smile of his. A lil curve of his lips and he could take your heart away.

“And that’s what we always do, right? Talk about me.” She replied faking her anger.

As he was about to reply, his phone beeped. This is one thing I had always noticed about him, his phone hardly rang and he was never stuck on his phone. Either he had no interest in his people or he had none.

He smiled at his cell-phone and kept it in his pocket.

“What happened?” I inquired.

“Nothing. An office colleague just told me that she hates me.” He replied with a smile.

“And you’re smiling at that? I mean, why does she hate you?” I raised my voice, a bit.

“Yes, I like people who hate me and I don’t need to know the reason. I am just contented that she does.”

“This can’t be a secret, right? You can tell me the reason behind this.”

“Sure, I can. See, I like people who hate me for several reasons. First of all, I’d never expect anything from people who hate me and neither will they. You don’t owe them anything. Its opposite with the people whom you love.

Further, the people who hate me will never forget me. I’ll always cross their mind. The people who told me they loved me already have. And that’s why I am not comfortable when people tell me that they love/like me. I know they are lying now and they will leave someday. On the other hand, people who hate me shall always be with me. Trust me, as far as I have known, Hate is a much better emotion that love is.” He spoke while remembering all the people whom he had loved and who had sworn to stay by him, forever.

“I see, one of the reasons why people cling on to their love so stubbornly is because they know, once it’s gone, All you’ll be left with is pain. And that is why I try to envelope myself in hatred. I somehow feel secure there.” And he smiled with so much sadness in his eyes.
I just kept walking. I had nothing to say.


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